Poor blodge, i took him out to maccas with his little brothers , (splodge and podge), and a fucken seagull nicked his chips. he was a bit peckish, (and is a bit partial to gull), unfortunately he fell off the roof trying to get the gull. Thank fuck he was on a diet and didn't splatter as much as he would've before going on the diet.
Still the fat little fucker cost me 700 bucks to get the remains carted away. It is so hard to get rid of waste fat nowadays.